Sunday, July 25, 2004
In the past year and a half, my lifestyle/beliefs have made a drastic change. As a result, I sold my full-size Dodge pick-up, motorcycle, a lot of cds, I've given away a lot of my excess clothes and crap, sold the house, cut way back on spending and waste. Now I have no debt at all and own very little (and will be getting rid of more).
Oh yeah-I also gave my 2-week notice at work this past Friday, which I am hoping brings to a close my time as an engineer.
What now? Good question. I leave for Nepal at the end September and then will be traveling for a while. My itinerary is not set yet, but I am looking to spend most of my time in SE Asia, and I'm working on making some contacts at organic farms in Hawaii in an attempt to set up work.
A drastic change? Yeah. I just heard that Ricky Williams is retiring from football to travel and "find himself". My goals started out that lofty. However, I've come to decide that I am not out to find myself. If I do, great, but I don't want to taint my experience with such high expectations. There is a lot I need to figure out (since most everything I have thought/believed thru most of my life up to this point has been turned upside down), and hopefully I achieve some clarity. We'll find out. Who knows, maybe the elephant of my dreams will crush me, negating the need to figure anything out!
I have no plan for when I get back, and have no idea when I will get back. Is it scary? In a way, I suppose. With the announcing of my 'retirement', it's become much more real so I am sure my feelings on the matter will change. It's exciting to have no idea where my life is going to go or what my future holds. I'd like to survive this trip and maybe figure life out a little in the process (if that is even possible), but whatever happens happens.
Is this irresponsible? Probably. But so what? I have no true responsibilities so why not? I'm tired of all the 'restrictions' placed on me because of what our society dictates is normal, expected, and necessary for a happy life. Bullshit. I know too many people who are unhappy with life but refuse (or 'can't') buck the norm. Screw that. I am tired of being restricted, and I'm out. Maybe I'll end up getting married while I'm gone. Or finding god, or being left behind and ending my days alone. Maybe senility will hit early and I'll end up on a beach somewhere walking in circles talking with myself (I'm at least half way to this conclusion). Maybe I'll decide to return to engineering and come back to Denver and 'settle down'. Maybe I'll be killed/die on this trip. Anything is possible. You'll just have to wait and find out. I'll be doing my best to get on here and keep people updated on my travels, hopefully with some pics to supplement the babble.
We'll have to wait and see what happens, I guess.
Congratulations on making the break to mental/emotional freedom. I have no doubt whatsoever that you will be rewarded for "following your heart." Many people dream the dream, but you are actually carrying out your dream. That takes guts. I hope you will be able to post now and then, as I'll be eager to hear of your travels and experiences. Perhaps many of us can taste the dream through you, even though we can't dine at the table.
Coincidently, I just finished reading "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho. Have you read this book? If not, I strongly recommend that you read it before you embark on your travels. It's a quick read, 1 or 2 days max. It was published in English more than 10 years ago, but I wasn't familiar with it until I saw Francesca's copy, among her things, after her recent death. It felt good to read it after losing Franny. It's such a fit to what you're doing, you've got to read it. If you can't get a copy, let me know and I'll get one to you.
"Everyone on earth has a treasure that awaits him....We, people's hearts, seldom say much about those treasures, because people no longer want to go in search of them. We speak of them only to children. Later, we simply let life proceed, in its own direction, toward its own fate. But, unfortunately, very few follow the path laid out for them -- the path to their destinies, and to happiness."
--from The Alchemist
Congrats, again, on "going for it."
Jim Opre (Francesca's Dad)
Thanks for all the kind words and the encouragement. I will definitely check out the Alchemist.
It's going to be quite and adventure, and I can't wait for it to start.
Take care, my thoughts are with you